Should it be called swallowing gum?

   You don't have to be a brain scientist to figure out I have been busy! Yep, that's right, looks like ol' Beff finally got a life. Although my life consists of reading to little kids all day, it is still something!
     But low and behold all good things come to an end and my last day of work is this Friday. I do not like this. So I have been trying to find another job. One that doesn't make me want to gag myself on an hourly basis. See the thing is I had a really nice gig at the elementary school. No one ever really bothered me in that Library, and since my mom is a teacher at the school, most all the teachers were already predisposed to like me. Not to mention the kids thought I was really cool because I knew all the youtube quotes they threw around, and I like Lady Gaga. Yep, it was the sweet life. But now the school year is ending and I am yet again on the hunt for a job.
    This brings me to my topic. Chewing gum, and if it really sits in your stomach for 7 years. Not seeing the correlation between looking for a job and the digestibility of gum? Don't worry it is not because you are stupid, it simply means you are slow, and that is nothing to be ashamed of.
    So here is the story. I was thinking of place to work, which is hard for me because I HATE doing menial jobs with mean bosses. This is why I did not last at Forever 21 or The Bridal Collection. But those are stories for another day.
   Today I went to Pier 1 Imports to inquire about their current hiring situation. As I walked into the store I remember one of the biggest no-no's in job searching. DO NOT CHEW GUM. But of course I did not realize I was chomping on my own piece until after I walked into the store and the manager saw me. I couldn't go spit it out, the only choice was to...gulp... swallow it.
     You know, I have never been one for swallowing gum. It always gags me, but desperate times calls me for desperate measures. So I did it.
     I didn't notice it at first, but about an hour or so later my throat started feeling really weird. Then I felt the heartburn (or at least what I think heartburn is). I think I have successful lodged my gum in my throat... great.
     So that old wives tale popped into my head! Will I have a piece of gum stuck to my stomach or intestines for the next seven years??
    Don't worry you don't need to whip out the "Get Well Soon" or "Thinking of You" cards yet, because as it turns out I am safe! Although it is not suggested to swallow CHEWING gum it is not harmful for adults. It will just pass through like everything else! Without delving deeper into the inter-workings of bowel movements we will leave it at that!
     But this still does not explain the very gum like lump I feel in my throat, so just take my suggestion and DO NOT SWALLOW YOUR GUM, even if you are going to inquiry about a job.

                                                    O so small yet O so treacherous

The Questions in Life

    It has come to my attention from all my faithful followers (my siblings) that I have neglected my little piece of the world wide web aka my blog. In pondering what to write about, an image of two skulls touching tongues popped into my head- yes I am referring to the artistic design aesthetic of the one and only Ed Hardy. If you are reading this blog and happen to enjoy or may even be wearing an Ed Hardy original, I suggest you stop reading this post immediately and keep our friendship in tact.
    A couple weeks ago my brother turned 23- Happy Birthday to Daniel. And for his present my mother gave him a "coupon" redeemable for a shopping trip. This naturally means that I took Daniel shopping. I do not say this in bitterness, shopping with my brother is one of my favorite things!
     So off to Burlington we go. But of course the irony of shopping is when you want to buy things there is nothing that catches your fancy, but when you have no money to buy things, everything catches your fancy. We found ourselves in this predicament, but we were not deterred. We turned that store out for anything that we mildly liked, and actually found some pretty dang good shirts for like five bucks each. I am kinda a big deal when  it comes to shopping. So as we were leaving the store I was on some sort of deal finding high and asked Daniel if he wanted to go to the next door store, which was Marshalls. He appeased me and we went in.
     I would also like to add I was so extremely controlled while we were shopping. I usually kind of go crazy and look for  lots of clothes for me, and buy clothes lots of clothes for me with my nonexistent cash flow, but I made this trip for Daniel, and did not try on a single thing!
    Ok back to the extremely long drawn out story. So we walked into to Marshalls and started perusing  through the shirts. A couple days prior to this whole shopping extravaganza Daniel and I were poking fun at Ed Hardy designs and the complete silliness that fads cause cultures. Actually Daniel's girlfriend and I were poking fun at Ed Hardy, and Daniel being different decided he favored Ed Hardy.
     So while we were browsing the racks the last thing I would ever hope for (strictly fashion speaking, I am actually not this shallow) happened. Daniel picked out the most frightening and disturbing shirt on the planet exclaiming this was to be included in the shirts to buy. I cannot even put into words the absurdness of this shirt so I will not even try. Here is a picture:

    O goodness..... why?
   After trying to convince me that this was the coolest shirt ever and it was so comfortable and amazing, I would not budge. I could not let my own flesh and blood advertise this.
     I may be sounding a bit harsh towards this company, but I do not hate them as much as I am letting on. Some of their designs I may of actually worn. But now that I have seen this, that is not a possibility anymore.
      I am not going to lie (which I usually don't because I am so bad at it!), but I feel kind of bad knocking Don Ed Hardy and his creepy designs so I decided to take a deeper look into his career, and what I found out has made not dislike his aesthetic so much, well I actually still don't like it at all- but it makes more sense now.
      So this guy, Don Ed Hardy, already gained more respect from me when I learned he is a Southern Californian native. No explanation needed. He is originally a tattoo artist who draws from Japanese aesthetics in his designs. This may be because he actually studied tattooing in Japan in the 1970s. So I guess I wrongly judged this guy. Maybe it is makes perfect sense that his designs don't appeal to me because I am not a tattoo type of person, and especially not a "skull tattoo inspired" shirt person.
     The moral of the story is for every person there is a shirt. Even the people that like tongue touching skulls who tell the world to "make love". I just may not be that person, but who I am to say you shouldn't be!

                                A funny track suit we found and of course had to be tried on!

Daniel- I hope you will still be my friend after seeing this post!